9 Tips to Combat Holiday Stress and Actually Enjoy Yourself as a Parent

While the expertly wrapped gifts, homemade delights, Pinterest-worthy decor, and pleasantly smiling children all make for a great Hallmark movie, the reality is often far from it, and that’s perfectly okay. It’s easy to set unreasonably high standards for ourselves as parents and forget that our kids (especially the young ones) don’t have the same lofty expectations. You don’t want to get so wrapped up in the stress of creating picture-perfect moments that you miss out on the thing that matters most: cherishing time with your loved ones. All that to say, be realistic about what you can accomplish. The handmade pie can wait.

It’s time to throw family guilt trips out with the spoiled fruit cake. Do your best to not get wrapped up in unsolicited parenting advice from that one relative or attendance expectations around the festivities. If you need to protect your sanity and just leave the holiday party, this is your permission to do so. Remember, you’re going to be the one taking care of your child after a missed nap, sugar high, or too much stimulation. As a parent, you know what’s best for you and your child more than anyone else. If you can’t make it for every single festivity or stay for the full duration, remember that your presence, even for a portion of the celebration, can still create meaningful memories with your loved ones.

One of the best ways to combat holiday stress? Avoid doing everything at the last minute. Get ahead of the game and make a list of your must-dos, from family gifts to groceries, booking travel, or throwing in a load of laundry. Writing down tasks can be a stress management tool to help you stay organized, prioritize what needs to get done, and help you stay productive on days that seem to slip away from you. Even crossing one thing off the list can give you a sense of accomplishment. That way it’s all in one place and not getting lost between all the “but, why?” and “can I have a snack?” questions from your toddler.

Remember the days when you’d step out the front door with no more than your wallet, keys, and phone? Now it involves meticulously packing snacks, toys, spare clothes, wipes, and all the other essentials in your “mom bag.” Running errands can be a journey and we don’t always have the luxury of shopping from place to place if you don’t find what you’re looking for on the first go. Take advantage of online shopping without ever leaving the comfort of your living room. Be on the lookout for Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals to save on gifting this year and have everyone checked off your list before December!

Spending hours in the kitchen over a hot stove is not ideal when you have young kids running around (and often asking for your attention every two seconds). Admittedly, I’ve been there and done that. I took it upon myself to prepare an entire Thanksgiving meal with a one-year-old waddling around to impress out-of-town friends and I quickly realized I bit off more than I could chew. Between the grocery shopping, prepping, cooking, and parenting, I was beyond exhausted and missed out on half the fun of relaxing and spending time with family and friends. Avoid the hassle and opt for a potluck or order from a local restaurant (there are so many that offer holiday meals!).

You’re not always going to have solo time to get everything done. Embrace the extra (little) hands and involve your kids in the must-dos, whether that’s decorating, gift wrapping, or baking cookies for that holiday party you’re attending. Sure, it may be a little chaotic, but if you embrace the mess and focus on the fun, it could turn into a memorable family activity. Give your little one some decorations to hang around the house; If you’re gift wrapping, let your little one “wrap” a random object or place gifts into gift bags with tissue paper; Have them make cards for loved ones while you handle the scissors and tape. There are so many ways to make your kids feel included so that the task is low-stress for all.

The holidays are about spending time with the people you love. Sometimes it’s about finding optimal ways to enjoy these moments to ensure everyone is (actually) having a good time. Consider options that are simple and flexible. Here are a few of my favorite activities that I enjoy with my toddler: taking scenic drives to admire holiday lights, hosting a cozy family movie night, visiting the park for some outdoor fun, decorating cookies, and painting or coloring festive artwork to hang around the house.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Reach out to your family and friends when you find yourself juggling more than you can handle. They can take on that one holiday task that’s been lingering or even lend a hand with the little ones while you tackle your to-do list. And if you’re short on time for shopping, consider a joint effort for a special group gift. It’s the kind where your sister handles the gift hunt, and you conveniently Venmo your share. Some years, it’s just the way it goes, and that’s precisely what family and friends are here for!

While we might not always find time for lengthy 20-step skincare routines or binge-watching our favorite shows, finding just ten minutes to pause, take a breath, and enjoy your coffee or tea in tranquility can work wonders. Those precious ten minutes can provide the clarity you need to reset or simply switch off in the midst of chaos. If there’s one daily act that can alleviate holiday stress, it’s this: embrace those brief moments of peace.